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- Where sexual racism against Asian straight men comes from
You've probably heard the term Rice King, a non-Asian guy who goes after Asian women. Or perhaps you've heard of Rice Queens, gay non-Asian men who go after Asian men.
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But have you ever heard of Rice Queens being used to refer to non-Asian women who go after Asian men? I've written about the subject of Asian men and sexual attraction in various ways over the years, beginning with my very first story for the Georgia Straight back in , a cover story about how Asian male actors were having trouble finding roles other than as brainy nerds, sexless doctors, or martial artists.
While Asian straight women are one of the most fetishized dating prospects, Asian straight men, on the other hand, are the least, virtually invisible when it comes to sexy images in popular culture, even when they are on par in terms of physical attractiveness as their non-Asian equivalents. Asian gay men fall somewhere in between, being either highly fetishized or being told "no Asians" on dating sites.
Racial fetishism - Wikipedia
Yet activism has taken place within the Asian gay male community, such as the Sexual Racism Sux campaign or a new site for Asian gay men, launched by local Edward Ho, to share their dating experiences and other efforts. The question remains if there is the same level of activism to address how straight Asian men have been depicted or treated. The invisibility of attractive Asian straight men in the media remains a longstanding and unaddressed problem, particularly in Hollywood, and it does have an impact on self-esteem, relationships, and mental health.
Here's a comprehensive explanation from MTV News that ties the history of gendered discrimination against Asian people in the U.
VQFF 2017: Project Gelb unravels the "No Asians" racism in gay male culture
Sexual attraction is complicated but it does integrate attitudes and perceptions absorbed from sources as varied as images in media, family attitudes, personal experiences, and more. The thing is, we all absorb discrminatory attitudes embedded from around us unconsciously—it's a question of whether we are actively working towards addressing them or not. This beautifully produced coffee-table book brings together over of Georgia Straight's iconic covers, along with short essays, insider details and contributor reflections, putting each of these issues of the publication into its historical context.
I am so kicking my self in the ass. I was rushing to get back to work. You and me looked at each While the men I spoke to agreed that guys tend to be explicit about their racial proclivities online, reading a situation in person can be more tricky.
Bish is black, and while he said he feels he is often approached specifically because of his race, "if it's clear they're willing to engage with me on an intellectual and emotional level in addition to a sexual level, then it's not necessarily a deal breaker. Watch VICE explore how mobile apps rose to become integral in modern dating: But not every situation is that easy to read, especially if you're trying to give guys the benefit of the doubt. I have seen that, and they're like, 'Oh, [you're] the one Asian I don't know.
Clearly, discerning someone's intentions is a matter of intuition. Sometimes signs may be obvious, even physical. But more often they emerge in casual conversation, whether it's a guy trying to hint that he's "down" or expressing an affinity for Asian food. But how do you distinguish between clumsy attempts to relate with someone's culture and a more uncomfortable sort of fixation?
The problem is that guys often make blatantly stereotypical assumptions—about everything from one's dick size to their taste in music—based on skin color alone, a sentiment shared among those I talked to again and again. While a first date invitation to a sake bar may be easier to look beyond, sexual objectification, and an inability to see minority men as viable romantic partners, is where many draw the line.
And that's where it bothers me the most," Tao said. That happens quite often. Whatever the fantasy may be, for guys who think they know what you're like in bed, their interest tends to stop there. While Bish admitted that, depending on where his head is at, it can be empowering to embody someone's fantasy, usually it just feels reductive. They're more or less the same, he will fill this slot. When discovering a guy has a "thing" for South Asians, Bhatt said he "feels like a commodity. You feel like he was not interested in you for you and who you are, he was interested in you because you have brown skin.
The narrower your ethnic group, the more exoticizing a guy's fixation can seem.
Where sexual racism against Asian straight men comes from
There was a time when I'd never experienced what Tao and Bish described in our conversations—a white guy surrounded by other men of my ethnicity. I've become used to being one of very few South Asian guys in the room, if not the only one, particularly in queer settings. My difference is by turns easy for me to overlook and a quality I fiercely guard like a unicorn horn. The first time it happened to me, I was at birthday drinks for a white friend. We'd met on Scruff a couple years earlier, and hooked up a few times before moving on to date other guys. I should have known when his boyfriend after me was Indian, but I didn't figure things out until I showed up that night and half of his dozen or so guests were other South Asian guys.
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As I joined them in the restaurant's streetside patio, I felt self-conscious—embarrassed, even—to be counted among what felt like his menagerie of South Asian conquests. I was sure he had hooked up with all of us at some point. I didn't confront him about it until some time later, when he admitted that he's long harbored a fantasy of winding up with an Indian man. I thought it sounded absurd. Had he ever even been to India? He couldn't quite explain it, and no, he's never been.